Why do we always make promises to others and try our best the follow through with them only to make promises to ourselves and then not do what we told ourselves we would do. For me that means – why do I say I am going to sit down at some point and take a break between task only to spend all my night continually working on my to do list. My list never gets done and when I finally get near the end of it I start moving things from my “I wish I had time to” list on to my to do list. It is now 11:13 and I am sitting down for the first time since lunch time with the exception of driving and watching my daughter do one of her dances at dance recital practice. I just so happened to come in right before her dance which made that stop a short one. I have been on a fieldtrip today and left there to go to Costco. Then I picked up my daughter and came home . . . and on and on my night has gone. One thing I did promise myself today that I was able to do was to eat dinner early. I have been eating as late as 9:30 and 10:00 some nights but I got to rotisserie chickens at Costco and my dinner was already ready. However, I have got to figure out a way to make myself stop for a little bit. Last time I checked there was no one passing out metals for those of us who don’t ever stop doing. Don’t get me wrong – what I am doing is good stuff. I am taking care of the needs of my family and on occasion friends and youth from my church. The person that I am not really taking time out for is me. I am starting to see it in my actions and in my speech and in the oddest place – in my sleep. You would think I would hit the bed exhausted but I sleep fitfully after I have trudged through my day. Then in the morning I need an IV hook up to the coffee pot.
Today I did accomplish something else that was very – very hard. I guess you can say I put feet to “relentless”. I have been looking up running training plans and I have found a new one that I want to work on. It is three days a week plan with one day is for a long run, one day for and easy run and one day to work on speed. Well today I decided to work on speed and I can honestly tell you that I would rather run 5 miles for over an hour then run 4 sets of .5 miles for speed with a .5 mile walk/jog in-between. I have never attempted speeding up my run. For me it has always been about how much further can I go? There is nothing like bragging rights in saying – yeah I ran 5 miles today or even I ran 2 miles today for that matter. The only people who have ever questioned my time on any of my runs have been other runners. I just answer them “I have never cared much about speed – I am just thrilled that I could run that far.” Well after 2 times down the road at full speed I had to remind myself – this is what relentless feels like. Let’s just say I had to repeat it several more times and give myself a pep talk too. I truly do not like speed training for two reasons – 1) it requires me to run fast (duh) 2) It requires me to stop running and then start running again. I don’t want to stop doing anything until it is done. If you want an example see the paragraph above. However, with speed training you must at some point stop running to walk or jog slowly before you start running full speed again. Well once I stop running I HATE to start again. Isn’t that one of Murphy’s Laws or something? Well I plan on sticking it out. “ It is only one time a week” is what I will try and sell myself each week. I sure hope and pray that God will teach me through this speed training how to incorporate the lesson on slowing down to recuperate into my everyday life as well. That is the great thing about physical training. It really isn’t only about physical training. It is also about training your mind and your will! I am kind of strong minded and strong willed so I guess I have a lot to learn but I know that God is faithful to continue to use running to teach me lessons in my life!
Thank you Father ~ that you don’t ever give up on me even when I get frustrated with myself. Thank you that you lead me and teach me and that you don’t waste anything!
Today’s meals – strawberry oatmeal w/ yogurt, apples, grapes, yogurt, veggies and dip, chicken, steamed veggies, strawberries
Today’s exercise – walk/run for one hour.
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